It’s the start of 2012 and in addition to resolutions, I’m thinking about two themes for what I want to get out of this year.
In keeping with the sentence stem that I’m using to start all my resolutions (“I resolve to express love for myself by ____”), I’m declaring that a theme for me for this year is to place a focus on self-care. (I have no doubt some of you are going to be happy to hear that.)
The other theme feels hard to admit to myself and also feels important to say out loud: I’m working on accepting the fact that I inspire people. I have it that I always hope I inspire, that it’s a goal of mine. The difference is for me to recognize that it’s already happening. Or (more true) to recognize that it’s been happening for years now.
Why put this focus on accepting it? Because I think that this will open up other possibilities for me, and because I think that it’s necessary in order to step into some of the work that I intend to do this year. I need to own my voice and my impact, and not expend much (or any) energy trying to prove it. Once I take it as a given, then I can move on to what I can do with that influence.
In so many ways it seems obvious yet I have had a hard time accepting it. Maybe that’s because I would then have to deal with the responsibility of my impact, maybe it’s because truly I’m most afraid of already being the person I hope to become. No matter what the cause it’s not really serving what I want to accomplish.
Even more, it’s not realistic for me to shy away from believing that I have, do, and will continue to influence and inspire others with my thoughts and actions. Thank you all for being persistent about continuing to tell me that over and over. It’s taken a while for it to get through. I might still forget, but at least it’s my intention to let it sink in this year.
Yes, I am thinking of this most famous quote from Marianne Williamson as I consider my theme:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”